Children feel valued when adults consistently make room for their voice, effort, interests

It grows through small, repeated moments that tell a child, “You matter here.” A child may forget what was served for dinner or whether the homework was checked on time. But they often remember how home made them feel. Feeling valued does not come from expensive gifts or constant praise.

Instead of only asking, “How was school?”, ask about the drawing they made, the game they played or the funny thing a friend said. Everyday back-and-forth interactions between children and caring adults are important for healthy development. Small questions show that a child’s ordinary world is worth knowing. UNICEF India also recommends talking and listening as part of positive parenting. A child does not always need an entire evening. Sometimes five phone-free minutes are enough.

Because it is predictable, the ritual matters.

“Good job” can become background noise. Sit nearby. Look up when they speak. Let the story about a broken pencil or playground argument finish before jumping in with advice. UNICEF recommends active listening and notes that eye contact and attentive responses can help children feel heard and connected. Specific appreciation feels different. Try noticing something precise: “You kept trying even after that puzzle became difficult. It tells children exactly which behaviour adults noticed and appreciated. The message becomes bigger than the achievement: effort itself has been seen. It could be a bedtime question, a Sunday morning walk, a secret handshake or five minutes of talking before lights out. Children learn that there is a small space in the day that belongs to them. Ask for their opinion when choosing dinner, arranging a shelf or planning a weekend activity. Give them age-appropriate responsibilities too. This is not about making children feel powerful over adults. It tells them their presence has value. Involving children in household activities and allowing them opportunities to participate. Children feel valued when adults consistently make room for their voice, effort, interests and presence. No parent can be perfectly available every day. What matters is the pattern built over time.